Bachelor in Paradise: Corinne Confessions, Dean’s Double Timing & Lacey’s Going Canadian Bacon

I’m going to sum up the circus like this:

  • Lacey literally jumps Canadian Daniel’s bones the second he makes his arrivals and makes it crystal clear that she’s been waiting for HIM and only him. He correctly assesses Lacey as one of “the leftovers” along with Jasmine and Christen. What I love about Daniel is he says what everyone else is thinking to the people he’s thinking it about. He has no inner monologue. It’s all just out there, for better or worse. He basically says to Lacey’s face – I’m borderline interested in you, but I’m going to talk to other people. Even when he gets the date card and she makes clear that she wants to go, he’s like – “Yeah, we already know each other, so might not be a need to go on date to learn more.” Ouch. But Lacey hangs in there against all rational thinking and somehow lands that date card. She speaks Daniel, after all.  I’m still not clear on what happened when Jasmine came to interrupt their kiss – did she end up making out with him? Did he resume the kissing? Who knows. Who cares?
  • As for Jasmine, I was sooooo happy that she’d be going home and we wouldn’t have to hear to one more word of her insane, belittling, enraging remarks. But damnit, Matt comes back (as predicted by Husband) to give her his rose. She casually accepted it and is clearly having an internal meltdown because the 3 days she knew Matt, he’s not ready to fall in love back and propose. The fact that the show took any time at all to interview her in the studio with Chris Harrison and have her confront Matt, is such a reflection on the season itself? Who cares about Jasmine and Matt’s relationship? Seriously – do any of you care? I don’t. I’m moving on. Chris Harrison basically reiterated Jasmine’s insane and that Matt should stay far away.
  • Everyone is still being mean to Christen and the scallop fingers thing isn’t funny. Like at all. I’m glad that it looks like someone tells her what’s going on next week.
  • Dean. Dumb Dean. Cruel Dean. What is his problem? Yes, at this point Kristina should either leave or separate herself completely from Dean and try to find someone else. Yes, it’s impossible. Yes, she’ll never find someone with the same intensity that she liked Dean, but he’s wronged her multiple times and she deserves so much better. The fact that she has to sit around after getting Dean’s rose and then watch as he pursues Danielle, is just horrible. Especially since they’ve been continuing their intimate time. It’s disgusting. Dean has to have a sense of the pain he’s inflicting on Kristina. She’s holding on to hope and he’s giving it to her. She should move on and he should be ashamed of himself. And you actually hear Dean tell Danielle that he thinks he could fall in love with her? WTF, Dean? Then why did you give Kristina your rose? He’s a man child. I can’t deal with him. Kristina better find a much hotter, more mature guy who worships her.
  • Christen is now a desired jewel. I don’t find Tickle Monster or Adam remotely attractive (or Matt for that matter), but somehow Tickle manages to seduce Christen. Though it sounds like Jack Stone is able to win her back post date? Or is he? Why is he kissing everyone else next week?
  • Does Raven actually have feelings for Adam or is she just happy to be saved? I’m glad Sarah is gone – couldn’t take much more of her.
  • Ben Z – why is he just unable to make a romantic connection with any of these girls? Is it really because he’s all dog talk? Didn’t Danielle say to him when she accepted his rose that she wouldn’t have accepted a rose from anyone else? Or maybe I misheard her. But it doesn’t matter because she’s not into Ben Z.

Ok, so then we get to the Corinne Chronicles. In she comes with her innocent white spaghetti strap dress and her hair pulled back in a half pony so she can look like she’s 16 and couldn’t harm a fly. The only redeeming thing going on here is that Corinne admits that she has nothing against DeMario. Of course she prefaces that statement with the statement that she was basically blacked out for their entire encounter – so is that really a vindication for DeMario? I sure hope so. I’m guessing her legal team subpoenaed the video tapes and perhaps were given the footage to show that she really was consenting to whatever went on with DeMario. And her only justification for doing those sorts of intimate acts with someone she had only known an hour is to claim she was blacked out. I mean – what medication was she on? Is there a medication that when mixed with alcohol allows you to act completely like yourself but then takes away your memory? I’ve never heard of such a thing, but maybe I should take it when I go to work. Too soon? Too harsh? I don’t know if I believe Corinne.

Ultimately, it was a third party producer who alleged the misconduct – so it wasn’t Corinne saying that something bad went down. She was caught up in it – but by claiming to be a victim, that puts the shame on DeMario. I didn’t really see her recognize it. Because yes she went through this situation – but for her, it was as a white female promiscuous label and for DeMario – it’s Black aggressor – something completely unfair and NOT equivalent. For DeMario, it means, loss of employment and future job opportunities, reputational damage and the pain that being affiliated with a sexual misconduct does to a person. I think Corinne comes out of this just fine as Corinne always does. In any event, hoping this topic has been put to bed and everyone can move forward.

Other things I’m pondering:

  • Wells never answered the question on what happened with Danielle when she came back from her volunteer work. Did they rekindle? Was that kiss just Wells giving Danielle some romance for the cameras (that’s kind of what his statement implied – that it was just so she wouldn’t leave without something – but that he wasn’t necessarily interested in her). Hmmmm….
  • Is Wells our next Bachelor?
  • I tried calling the Ben Higgins / Ashley I podcast telephone number today to ask some very important questions, but the number wasn’t work. I’ll try again tomorrow. In particular, I’m curious whether Ben Higgins only dates model types and if Ashley I has tried to talk any sense into her bestie, Dean, who she seems to hang out with constantly and is also sometimes dropping in on her podcast.
  • Does Lacey look a little bit like Carrie Bradshaw, minus the funny personality and confidence?
  • We’ve seen zilch from Dominique and Diggy. I can see Diggy and Daniel getting together romantically.
  • Is Christen’s virginity up for grabs? Didn’t realize so many guys are down to date a virgin.
  • Was anyone else happy that Taylor was basically speechless for the full two hours? Miracles do exist.
  • Did anyone else realize that what Jasmine did tonight by stealing Daniel away from Lacey mid-kiss is arguable worse than what Christen did with Matt? Matt actively sought out Christen to let her know his interest in going on a date. Daniel is not out looking for Jasmine.
  • Does Tickle travel with baby plastic hands at all times to seduce women with? Definitely odd – you’d think he could lead with, “I’m a doctor” and the ladies would swoon. The tickle thing is just gross.
  • Still scratching my head about Amanda and Robby.

Til next week, Bach fans.

Xoxo,

Stacey B (@OfficeStace)

 

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  1. Great recap Stace! I can not take Dean and very much want Kristina to drop him. Will there be any Dean fans out there after this?!! Ugh! I think you are right on about Corinne. The whole interview had an odd tone to it. She didn’t know the medication didn’t mix well with alcohol? What medication does go well with alcohol? Does she not read the labels of her medications or ask questions of her doctor? Hmmm… yeah, this is Corinne, and I don’t picture her reading much of anything.

  2. Although I’m not a huge DeMario fan, what happened to him after the shut-down wasn’t right. The day after production shut-down, I saw an interview with DeMario and he pretty much told everything that happened, and Corrinne was the aggressor and instigator, he just went along with it because she was leading the way. (And remembering that she got naked with Nick in the pool in front of the other girls, of course I knew she was totally uninhibited.) Then for her to declare “I’m the victim” and to lawyer up afterwards speaks volumes to HER character. Totally over her.

    And almost totally over this season of BIP. The only one I remotely “care” about is Kristina. Jasmine is psychotic. Taylor is very high maintenance. (Imagine having every word that comes out of your mouth scrutinized, put under a microscope, etc? He’ll be walking on eggshells around her all the time. They will NEVER last.) Even Raven, I really don’t care because I don’t think she’s there to “find love”. At least we’re not seeing Amanda every two seconds (yet) as she pursues her TV/Movie career. (Why else would she continuously leave her two babies for extended periods of time? Not judging, she can do what she wants, they’re her kids.)

    Ok, rant over. I guess I was just expecting so much more of this franchise for some summer romance…. is it Hockey season yet?

  3. I seriously can’t stand this season – and yet I watch. Not sure how much longer I can take it. Dean – had high hopes for him and now I can’t stand him. Losing respect for Kristina who seems shocked EVERY TIME Dean turns cold and warms up to D-Lo (dumbest name ever). Not understanding why Jack Stone is struggling to find a gal – he’s a good looking decent guy. Was sooooo hoping Jasmine was gone for good and seriously almost threw my wine glass through the TV when Matt came back to give her his rose. And then she’s on the After Show??? UGHHHHH! I didn’t like her on Ben’s season. Can’t stand her on this season. She is over the top irritating as hell personality wise. Matt is a coward and realize the only way to get his balls out of Jasmines purse was to leave the show. Totally cracked up with Chris told him when he was getting away from crazy – to not go back (or however he phrased it). I think it went right over Jasmine’s head.

    I usually enjoy my trash TV and enjoy the “stars” but this season I’m struggling to not be annoyed by all of them. I was far more interested in Danielle and Wells than any one else and honestly don’t think anyone will stay together. In fact – I’m hoping the Office lookalike guy gets a clue and RUNS away from Taylor and her trigger words as fast as he can! This seasons cast are more like high schoolers on spring break. The girls can’t seems to stop being “mean girls” and fake nice while backstabbing and the guys are just bozos who are thinking with their little head on who they can jump in bed with next. No quality people here.

    I think DeMario got shafted in every single way – and obviously the cast does too since he showed up with a support team of cast members who vouched for him last week. No one was vouching for Corinne this week, other than Amanda saying she went to dinner with her and she was doing well. I think the whole thing was blown wayyyyy out of proportion thanks to a crew member and glad it’s in the rearview.

    Ready for this season to BIP to also be over.

  4. I think I may have had it for this season. I sold my husband on a fun show and it’s been so boring! Last night I had a hard time staying awake. I skipped through the Jasmine interview, I have no idea why they had her and Matt on. I couldn’t stand to listen to her voice any longer. I also skipped through Corinne’s interview, I am so over the whole situation. I’m also really annoyed at how they’re dragging out the rose ceremonies. Also, it seems like most of the people get together/talk before the show airs, which I think takes the fun out of watching them get to know each other.

    I’ve had it with Kristina, she keeps walking into the fire, no more sympathy for her. Wasn’t it shrimp Christen was eating and not scallops? Maybe I missed something? I’m with Cindy- everyone is annoying me. And it definitely wasn’t cool of Wells to make fun of Christen’s appearance. Changes how I look at him.

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