New York City is having a Nor’easter this evening, and Nick Viall’s ladies don’t seem to be faring much better. Talk about dramatic, I got trapped in my apartment building’s elevator on Saturday morning at 7 AM braless, in my pajamas and had to call 911. I was eventually able to get out, but had to walk 22 stories down holding my dog. Thank goodness Ellie wasn’t with me. I was in pure panic mode for about 7 minutes and I don’t want to ever go back there.
Speaking of panic mode – I am still shuttering thinking about Taylor explaining to Corinne what “emotional intelligence” is. Did that conversation really happen?
But let’s rewind.
We start off in the heat of Awesome Vanessa’s calling out of Nick’s shenanigans in Corinne’s bouncy tent of lust. Vanessa isn’t scared of anything. She may have thrown out her boldest move yet by threatening to give the rose back if Nick isn’t serious about this process. She asks him point blank – is he looking for a wife or someone to f-k around with? GREAT QUESTION, Vanessa! We’re all wondering the same thing too. Sure looks like he’s having fun. Doesn’t Nick know he can’t have his bouncy house, a topless Corinne and private whipped cream moments if he’s looking for a wife? Vanessa has gone where no Bachelor lady has gone before – she’s announcing her self-worth by indicating that she actually has a choice in this process. She can choose to leave! But she doesn’t…
And of course we already know that Nick is going to keep Corinne because the previews have promised her seduction of Nick to “explore each other sexually” and a fight with Taylor. So nobody is surprised at all when she gets the rose, even if it was last to be more dramatic. It seems that Nick has been sending home the “nice” “cute” girls like Christen, who Liz confided in about her prior relations with Nick.
When Brittany started speaking after she got cut, The Husband was like, “Wow, that’s too bad. She seems really cool and normal.” Of course the longer she started speaking, the more upset she got and she eventually burst into tears. Then The Husband said, “Yeah, ok, I get it.”
Meanwhile, is there any girl who didn’t want to slap Corinne across the face for making a speech after the rose ceremony about how this was all about finding love and how you had to go after it and be yourself? She is so feeding these girls’ flames. I think Corinne is a lot smarter than she lets on. She’s pushing all the right buttons on them.
So the girls are all excited to go to Wisconsin – you can just see the glow in their false eyelashes and foundation when Chris Harrison announces their first destination (not really). BTW, the fresh-faced version of some of these girls makes them unrecognizable! So my thoughts on Danielle L – she is a very sweet, easy to talk to kind of girl – easy going, upbeat, beautiful. But I got the sense that Nick was trying to dig deep with her and came up short. If you remember from Andi Dorfman’s season with Nick, she said that her conversations with Nick were some of the deepest, most intellectual she’s ever had with anyone. I just don’t see that happening with Danielle. L This doesn’t make her a bad person – I think he’s just interested in connecting on a level that she may not possess. (This is why I think he clicked with Vanessa so well). The Husband thinks that Nick was very interested in her dress on the evening portion of their date. I mean, why doesn’t she just serve up her two friends on a platter? That’s what the dress said to me, but good for her. She’s pulling out all sorts of tactics. I support her being supported.
What did you make of Nick and Danielle L running into his ex girlfriend? Is there any way that wasn’t planned? I feel like there is this show going on called The Bachelor which is about finding an appropriate wife for Nick. Then there’s also this sort of side show going on which is intended to make us like Nick. Am I crazy? Or are we being given a little bit of propaganda by watching touch moments with Nick’s parents and them cheering Nick on with him having tears in his eyes? Or what about Nick’s support of his adorable little sister Bella during soccer? Perhaps ABC is betting that if the grander audience grows to love Nick, their ratings will go up too. Makes sense. And I’ll drink the Kool-Aid a bit – I admit his pow-wow with his parents was rather touching.
The farming group date was definitely amusing. Jaimi the nose ring girl now has straight hair and proved that she knows how to work a nipple. Maybe she dated a new mom at some point or maybe she’s used to milking things. Who knows? Corinne’s whole song and dance about how she had to sit out because of bad circulation to her hands (she almost ended up in the hospital, Guys!) reminded me of when Ellie gets bored at ballet class and simply lays on the floor (cheek to hardwood) refusing to get up. They never did show us any sort of engagement by Nick to get to the bottom of Corinne’s walking away from the shit. Perhaps she was being symbolic (She won’t deal with the shit happening around her? There’s a shitstorm in town and she won’t participate?). You know Nick had to go see if she was ok and I’m sure she explained herself in her cutest Corinne baby voice.
So now we are on to the mysterious, dark haired Raven. She may be our dark horse. And I’m not just saying that because she has dark hair. Nick’s dad seemed into her saying that the name “Raven” suits her. I think Nick was very intrigued by Raven to have her on this special date. She is the first to meet his family and little sister (note: Juan Pablo took now ex-fiance Nikki Ferrell to meet his parents on their first one on one date). They looked like they had an absolute blast at the roller skating rink and who knew that Nick was an amazing skater? They looked like they were having the equivalent of a Dirty Dancing moment together. I feel like Raven wasn’t really on the radar before tonight but she is very much in the game. She’s different from the rest of the girls, but she’s smart and Nick knows it. I liked her chat with Bella, who was fully vetting her for Nick.
My eyelids are getting heavy, but I feel it only right to devote a little time on this blog to the infamous Corinne. Last week I found her to be very sad. This episode, it was a mixed bag. Yes, she’s absolutely over the top talking about her nanny, complaining about being on the farm and shoveling “poopy.” Yes, she’s immature and completely overdramatic in almost every opinion that she addressed. That said, shouldn’t these girls just focus on their relationships with Nick? They are all clearly threatened by Corinne. The only ones who have managed to ignore it completely are Vanessa (who rightfully told Nick that she holds HIM accountable, not Corinne), Rachel (who doesn’t even think twice about Corinne) and Raven (who gleefully celebrates that not only did she get a one on one this week, but that Corinne DIDN’T get it).
A number of girls confronted Corinne this week. First it was a joint endeavor by Sarah and Taylor. It failed. Next came the Russian Kristina who set Corinne off. Then there was the group discussion led by Corinne where she called everyone out for talking about her behind her back. An admirable attempt to clear the air, but it also failed as everyone Sarah questioned her maturity and readiness to be married. The finale was the conversation with Taylor. Now Corinne has been completely ridiculous but Taylor came off as mean, condescending and immature herself. Not her best look as a new mental health counselor. Clearing Taylor is threatened by Corinne or nobody would pay her any attention. This is a 23 and a 24 year old having it out and Taylor’s defining for her emotional intelligence. I actually was on Corinne’s side for this showdown. Call her crazy and childish, but Corinne has something that Nick is interested in (or two things). She definitely brings an element of sass and the unknown.
We’ll have to wait until next time to see how this blow out fight turns out. What do you think? Who’s on the list and who is off? Nick is certainly into brunettes. The Russian Kristina, Whitney, Astrid, Danielle L, Vanessa, Alexis and Raven are all dark haired beauties. Of everyone else, I think Vanessa, Raven and Rachel are in the top 3 position with Danielle L in a close 4th. The other Danielle (blonde), whom he had his first date with, I believe is being surpassed by his other relationships. Also, did anyone see how TALL she is compared with the other girls? She seems to be taller than Astrid.
Hope to hear from all of you. Please check out what else I did this weekend with Ellie on Instagram: (www.instagram.com/OfficeStace)