I think my heart is still beating as fast as JoJo’s was throughout this entire episode. My mind is in a zillion places – no different than Ben on the morning of his proposal day, no doubt. Watching this episode was like being on a roller coaster of excitement, hope and insanity. Going into tonight, I predicted that he’s choose Lauren B, but was definitely leaning towards hoping that JoJo was his choice. By the end of the first hour of the episode, I found myself going all in on JoJo and really hoping he would choose her.
Here’s why:
- How many women can you actually lay all your cards out on the table with – including that you’re in love with another woman as well – and have that woman still be there for you, stand by you and trust you with their heart?
- He’s referred to JoJo and his conversations with her as being the deepest, most connected and calming. He says they have passion, romance, etc.
- He calls JoJo his best friend – what more do you want than that (and her boobs?)
- Did you see her rock that bright yellow bikini in the water and how amazing her blondish highlights at her ends curled upwards look with her big brown eyes just asking to be loved?
- Looks aside, doesn’t JoJo just seem so real? Like the girl you want to stay up all night and laugh with and just adore in every way possible? Wait, am I in love with JoJo? That could be. Am I in love with Ben AND JoJo? Oh wow – I just figured out how Ben must feel.
- JoJo and Ben have been through some ups and downs along their journey – their connection wasn’t all about initial chemistry and attraction. It developed naturally over time. They worked through their issues with great communication and got to a stronger place. She seemed to be his rock throughout this crazy journey.
- Lauren B and Ben have never had a conflict yet. Why didn’t he completely share with her how he was feeling about JoJo? It’s not like all his thoughts of JoJo disappeared when he was with Lauren B – he seemed pretty shaken on both their boat ride together and their last night together. That would have been a perfect time to test some conflict. Did he not feel comfortable doing so?
- Ben’s mother even voiced that the JoJo meet and greet was “different” (in a positive way) than Lauren B. They kept referring to Lauren as “polished” whereas JoJo just had this very real and warm feeling about her. She voiced right away that Ben is hard on himself (something that Ben’s mother had to point out to Lauren B). Moms always know – that’s all I’m saying. Lauren’s got to be psyched that JoJo is the next Bachelorette, or she’d probably always wonder if Ben’s having any Jason Mesnick feelings of regret. What happens when they have their first big fight? Will Ben be on the next plane to Texas?
- Lauren B has a very real “trophy wife” kind of feel to her. She’s sweet and happy and seems very much to adore Ben, but even at the end of the show, Ben said twice that he “couldn’t wait to show her off.” I don’t understand this comment. We’ve all already seen them together. What does he want to show off exactly – her beauty? Her commitment to him even knowing that he loved someone else at the same time? Does he just feel guilty? They really do look like Barbie and Ken together and they have perfect families as well. I just don’t know how they will deal once the cameras are gone, she’s moved to Denver and realizes that they have to be regular people – only she wants to be a pilot and fly for a living and he wants to plant roots.
Ok, so some specific comments about tonight’s episode: Ben looked even more amazing than last week, if that’s possible. I loved his clothing choices – very sporty but casual but classy. If the software salesman thing doesn’t work out, he could certainly be a runway model. So could Lauren B and JoJo. I was a bit confused about his hair on the After the Final Rose segment. It looked particularly fluffy – maybe not gelled? Also, he was going with some patchy facial hair – not my favorite look. He seemed very pale compared to JoJo, but that’s because they legitimately spray tan the crap out of all of their Bachelorettes, when they’re announced. She still looked absolutely beautiful.
Other thoughts about tonight – I’m still in literal shock that Ben was still telling both women that he was absolutely in love with them right until the end. What did you guys think about this? I mean, even when JoJo asked him point blank – what are his doubts about her – Ben couldn’t name one thing. NOT ONE THING. I could name 2 (her brothers). And the fact that she wants to stay in Texas. Ben didn’t even see those things as issues. When they were at that waterfall and she raised the fact that they hadn’t spoken very much about their future together, he agreed. I was surprised by this. He’s in love with her, but they hadn’t spoken about logistics of their future? Could this really be? Was this the case with Lauren B? How do you plan to marry someone without speaking about your future plans? Or are we just missing some camera time when these conversations took place?
Ben wakes up on the day he’s getting engaged and still doesn’t know who he wants to marry? WHAAAAAAAAT? My stomach was in knots at this point. Anyone else?
Is it really the Neil Lane engagement rings that gave him clarity? How can Lauren B see this episode and feel reassured? Ben is saying these wonderfully loving and perfect things to JoJo like when he makes his decision it will be forever and blah blah blah. I thought – my goodness, Ben and JoJo connect on a whole other level that I’ve never seen with Lauren B. They are true partners. True loves. True communicators. She’s amazing and he’s amazing and they would make perfect brunette amazing babies together. Even in his confusion, JoJo is there for him. She’s not freaking out – she just asks questions. And he’s assuring her that he’s in love with her. And when asked later – he doesn’t even regret saying that he loves JoJo. WHAT??? OMG OMG. I am so in love with Ben and JoJo at this point.
And then…
That gorgeous sequin pink gown steps out of the limo first. DAMN IT. WTF??? He looks at a Neil Lane ring and knows it’s Lauren B? What? How? Is he really ready to say goodbye to his amazing relationship (really more than a relationship – it was LOVE, I felt it!) with JoJo? I still don’t understand what went wrong with them. And hearing Ben explain to her that he still loves her makes it all the more confusing. Is it a mistake? Will he run after the limo? Will he call her to turn around? How can this be?????? I feel heartbroken. My heart was pounding. I had tears in my eyes watching JoJo pull away. I felt blindsided too, JoJo!!!
Yes – I know her brothers were crazy and her dad was hostile and maybe it wasn’t the most ideal, warm welcoming family to get involved with, but Ben and JoJo’s love seemed real and something that could last. To watch him send her away felt like a kick in the gut to me. Their connection felt real and strong. They were each other’s biggest supporters and they had tough conversations which made me think they had a chance in the real world.
So then out comes Lauren. She’s gorgeous in blue and happy and excited. I mean, Ben seems happy, so I’m happy for him. BUT, Lauren just didn’t have that Wow factor for me like JoJo did.
On the other hand…WE’VE GOT OUR NEW BACHELORETTE. When Chris Harrison said it wasn’t who we thought it would be, I thought they were going to give us Caila or present some nonsense where poor JoJo would have to compete with Caila to become Bachelorette like last season. Even as I watched JoJo reunite with Ben, she was so gracious and polite – wishing Ben and Lauren well, that I thought – well, she seems like she’s all lit up inside again. Either she met someone new or she’s the next Bachelorette. Because how else do you get over Ben Higgins?? What happens if we learn that Ben breaks up with Lauren B half way through JoJo’s season. Will he come running for JoJo? Now THAT could be the best Bachelorette season ever. And how do you cast 25 men that are better than Ben?
One other important question – can you believe that Bachelorette Kaitlyn Bristowe actually passed over Ben Higgins? I mean, WHATTTTT? BIG MISTAKE, HUGE.
I’m certainly thrilled that JoJo is the Bachelorette or we were looking at a very dull season of Lauren B or Caila. JoJo will be amazing – but I hope she has some great guys in the mix. I’d be very happy if they could bring back some stars from previous seasons to compete like the other Ben from Kaitlyn’s season.
So what do you all think? Did it seem like they ran out of things to talk about by the end of the show? I guess they left time in case there was an actual wedding, but Ben is a wise man and he wasn’t going to rush it. I’m glad to hear that Lauren will be moving to Denver shortly – that will actually give them a real shot at making it work. I guess that’s one benefit of Lauren B – Ben won’t have to move to Texas. Lauren looked beautiful tonight in her white lace dress. They really are a perfect looking couple (with Ben’s hair gel).
Ok, it’s way too late. I feel like I’ve been through an emotional car wash of extreme hopefulness turn disappointment turned shock and then resolution with JoJo being crowned Bachelorette. Hoping you all found peace in tonight’s show. If things don’t work out for Ben & Lauren B (are they maybe the first couple that I wouldn’t be disappointed if they split or is that just selfish?), I’d vote him as a repeat Bachelor any day (second to him pursuing JoJo, as long as we get to watch). I’m still thinking that Ben misses his best friend, JoJo.
I’ll leave you with that thought. And if you have a void in your life now that The Bachelor is over and need some new entertainment – pick up a copy of my book, Knot the One. Hear all about how The Husband and I ended up together (after our own rollercoaster). You can buy it in e-book, hard copy or audio book version here: Knot The One. If you haven’t already, you can check out what me, The Husband, my toddler daughter Ellie and adorable dog are all up to on Instagram and Twitter. Handle for both is @OfficeStace.
As always, I want to thank my readers for following with me on another Bachelor journey. This was certainly a season that will go down in the record books and I’m always grateful for all of your comments and fierce love for this show. Get ready for May 23rd for JoJo’s journey – which is right around the corner. Check back here for updates in between.
Thank you, Bachelor Nation and OfficeStace fans! Now let’s hear what you thought? #TeamJoJo? #TeamLaurenB? #TeamBenForLife
xoxo,
Stacey B
jaya says
Stacey, I felt exactly the same as you. I thought it would be Lauren, but as the show progressed, it looked like Jo Jo. It seemed to me that when he greeted Lauren, he was a bit reserved, but when he was with Jo Jo, Ben seemed ecstatic. I was hoping that Ben would stop the limo. I was hoping that he and Lauren had broken up, and Jo Jo would come out as his fiance.
And then I was hoping that when he saw Jo Jo come out, he “would throw caution to the wind”, and declare his love for her.
All these things didn’t happen, but Ben is a great guy, much like The Husband, I gather.
I also hope there will be a future for Ben & Jo Jo, minus the brothers.
Read, Knot the One, loved it.
Ella says
I’m not at all surprised he chose Lauren. She’s the perfect white bread trophy wife he’s always wanted. I was absolutely shocked when Chris announced JoJo as our next Bachelorette- like, my girlfriends and I started screaming- I was so sure it was going to be Caila and I was very pleasantly surprised! Look, I think Ben is fine. I think he sometimes doesn’t take other people’s feelings into consideration (see: Jubilee and Caila’s departures) but otherwise, we could have done a lot worse with our bachelor. Ben needed a blonde, boring, hair-extensionsed trophy wife- and he got her. Lauren is lovely, but boring as eff. I’m sure they’ll be very happy together reading Bible passages and making babies, and that’s totally fine, I’m stoked for them. But JoJo deserves more than that, and I hope she gets it on the next season on the Bachelorette- she certainly deserves it.
PLynn says
I agree. I wondered about JoJo and the faith angle. After all she is half Persian. We know that Lauren prayed with Ben over the baby turtles so they must be on the same page that way. Also, I think the families match better. I can’t see Ben and those two jackass brothers of JoJo.
Stacey B says
I think JoJo is half Iranian – but she seems to definitely be religious. She mentioned that she prayed as well throughout this process. But completely agree, PLynn that Ben and Lauren’s families mesh better. Those brothers were tough and I’d think would be the source of a lot of stress for JoJo / Ben.
katbyrd says
I think this was one of the heaviest edited seasons yet. Mike Fleiss is so PO’d that the spoilers get out beforehand, that he’s determined to edit the crap out of the show to keep everyone guessing. I’m not that sure that Ben was so totally in love with JoJo, too, I think he was acting a role dictated to him by production. He fell in love with Lauren on their first date, and it was edit, edit, edit after that (for both of them) to not give it away. Having said all that, I sort of miss the early days of this franchise (Trista, especially) where it all REALLY seemed REAL. Now, it’s more of a production. But I’m still hooked, so what can I say.
So happy that JoJo is the new Bachelorette!! She will b a good one, for sure.
Stacey B says
Hi Katbyrd – yes, I too felt very duped in the end when he just seemed to have a lightbulb moment for Lauren B. I mean he said point blank to JoJo multiple times that he loved her – even at the very end, after he broke up with her. How does that make sense? And when Chris H asked him last night whether he still loved JoJo, Ben chose his words very carefully – saying “I have so much respect for her” but how could he just check out from JoJo after being in love? How much time has passed since that finale? I’m cheering for JoJo – she’ll be so interesting and fun to watch. I hope she gets some real great guys.
katbyrd says
I think they said they wrapped in November. And probably JoJo was “in the loop” and playing her role, too. I hate to think that way, but how else would she not have been just devastated? Unless she wasn’t as “in love” with him as she thought? Confusing, for sure. But very happy for Ben and Lauren, and hopefully they will join the happily married circle of Bachelor / Bachelorette.
Janelle says
I have to say… I get the feeling that the producers have been setting up for Jojo to be the bachelorette for a long time. The family drama during her hometown was fake. One of her brothers was on Eva Longorias dating show…so that drama was staged. I felt that Ben and Jojos one on one’s were a little scripted as well. Also, Lauren B sleeps in until 10 everyday? Must be nice!
Stacey B says
Janelle – totally missed the Lauren B sleeps til 10 every day. Ahhh, those days seem like a lifetime ago. I remember hearing about JoJo’s brother being on a reality TV dating show – still not sure what the heck is real and what is edited. I don’t think Ben was given a script though – he said as much when the brothers accused him of being coached.
Anonymous 4 says
That was on Jimmy Kimmel. But remember she’s a flight attendant and they work non-stop 24 hours and constant jet-lag so she deserves a sleep-in. Till the babies arrive 😉
Susan says
Like you, I felt that JoJo was the much more grounded and mature of the two. Lauren B seems like a nice person, but not particularly deep. I was really rooting for JoJo.
Jennie says
I think Ben and JoJo had something very natural and supportive and deep.
But I’ve also seen the connection between Lauren and Ben from day one. She’s been so genuinely real and down to earth on their interactions and I do see a very deep connection there. Something feels very “right” between them.
I think they are a great for for each other and I can’t wait to watch JoJo as the Bachelorette!
Stephanie says
Yes–agree with all this!
katbyrd says
Me too!!
NMKL says
I totally agree with you, Stacey. Although at first I thought he’d pick Lauren, as the episode went on it seemed crystal clear that he would pick JoJo. How do you pass up a deep, best friend relationship with passion and intimacy for a relationship that seemed to be lacking in all those things? I don’t understand Ben’s choice and I don’t think he and Lauren will get married. If that’s the case, maybe he can be the Bachelor for a second time!
Stacey B says
I’d be for that, NMKL!
Denice Girdner says
For me, this was the best match of any Bachelor show I’ve seen so I feel the exact opposite of how you felt.
Lauren B was the best match consistently through the show. Their conversations and connection was always so natural and different from any others I have seen on the show.
One thing I loved about Lauren B over JoJo is that she rarely touches her hair. JoJo can’t stop and it’s almost like a nervous tick. Nevertheless, I like JoJo and am so relieved she is the next Bachelorette (even tho her family would not be one that I would want to marry into).
Stephanie says
SO RELIEVED it was Lauren! I was team Lauren the whole time. I think that she and Ben had an instant connection. They are instinctively drawn to one another and that is very telling. On a more practical level I think Lauren will be very grounding for Ben. I think Ben and JoJo are more emotional than Lauren. Lauren will be a good balance for Ben’s emotional, romantic personality. The proposal was so sweet, and their interactions/teasings etc were so natural. It looks like they can completely be themselves around one another.. and I just didn’t see that with Ben and JoJo. I’M happy and I think Ben has zero regrets. I think his comments about “wanting to show her [Lauren] off” have to do with having to keep the relationship secret these last few months. They’re just ready to be out in the open as a couple.
I like JoJo for the Bachelorette! I didn’t want it to be Kaila, but I was hoping for Jubliee! JoJo is a great choice because she will be popular with men and women. The bachelors vying for her will be drooling. JoJo moved on quickly and didn’t seem too broken apart about losing Ben (even in the moment!), so that goes to show that they weren’t right for one another. Even she could tell from the footage that he had a stronger connection with Lauren.
Can’t wait for May! I bet it’ll be another great season! Thanks, Stacey<3
Stacey B says
Couldn’t agree more, A4!
Stacey B says
Lisa – you are so right and crack me up. I too was disappointed at the result because it didn’t make sense to me as to why he wouldn’t pick JoJo based on everything we heard and saw between them. I don’t have anything in particular against Lauren B – just that the relationship between Ben and JoJo seemed so real and natural.
Lisa says
Thanks Stacey, I really like your blog; I read it every week. In the past I have had trouble getting posts to “post” but the last few weeks it has worked so I am happy to be able to participate in discussion!!!
The other plus about JoJo as our Bachelorette is that the husband will be right there next to me each episode, putting in his two cents. Normally he comes in around week 5 or 6 when the playing field is more narrowed down and he can tell who is who 🙂 But he will be watching for the pure joy of seeing JoJo each week. If it would have been Calia or Lauren I don’t think he would have been excited about keeping me company for those 2 hours.
Emily says
Hey, Stacey.
Thanks for blogging another season of The Bachelor. You were my original inspiration to start my own blog.
I know what you mean about JoJo but I think she and Ben just aren’t on the same level. I always felt JoJo was more mature and needed an older man. I like Ben. He’s a nice guy. But he’s young and he’s vanilla. Lauren and Ben match up perfectly from that perspective. JoJo has more depth.
You can check out my finale recap here: http://cafeemily.com/bachelor-2016-episode-11-recap/
BCIslandGal says
I agree Emily. Same reason Ben wasn’t Kaitlin’s choice. So sweet but too vanilla. he and Lauren are the perfect “All American” couple. I think it’s a good match and felt the editing was too much in JoJo’s favour so wasn’t surprised when he chose Lauren.
Jan in Colorado says
I felt that with Ben constantly talking about how Jojo felt like a best friend that this put her in the friend zone- a friend that is super hot and that he loved to kiss, etc. When Jojo mentioned that they hadn’t really talked about their future I knew too that this relationship wasn’t as serious. The fact that he confided in Jojo about being in love with Lauren, but did not share this with Lauren told me that Lauren was the one. He didn’t want to jeopardize Lauren. He leaned on Jojo to help him through the tough dilemma.
Other clues along the way, Lauren got the turtle date and the hometown gym date and meet the friends in Warsaw at a bar date. These are real, let us take a peak into our future dates.
Plus, I live in Colorado- a place people love to move TO. Jojo wants to stay in Texas, or so it seems.
Jan in Colorado says
Also, I think they put Jojo in such a good light- nothing bad to say about her- because the show needs us to watch her on the Bachelorette, which I will definitely do. JoJo seems funny too. I hope they’ll let her keep that. It seems that we fall in love with so many of the not-chosen-ones, then they get all boring when they are directed on their own show. A concern is that Jojo’s brother did some sort of match making show too… the mean one.