Doubts in Dublin: The Bachelorette Regrets her Actions

Shawn-and-Kaitlyn-Bachelorette-talkWhat a strange season of Bachelorette. The episodes start in the middle, the format of the season is thrown for a loop and our Bachelorette is making some major mistakes. I mean, on the one hand, she’s never been the Bachelorette before so it’s not like she’s got experience.

On the other hand, there are some essential guidelines the leader of this show must always follow: (1) don’t have sex with someone before the fantasy suite dates if you don’t want to feel guilty about it, want others to find out or feel so guilty about it that you end up making sure the others find out; (2) don’t take the initiative to spend off camera time with anyone. It puts the guy  in a strange power position that neither one of you can handle and it’s just as bad as having sex with someone before the fantasy suite date; (3) don’t confess to any of the contestants that HE is YOUR ONE. Because even if he is, it throws off the whole magical formula of the show – which is that nobody can know that you’re in love with them before the very end. Also, if you tell that to someone and then you go ahead and have sex with somebody else or even make out with somebody else – YOUR ONE – is going to become in a mental lockdown that will cause them to self-destruct or become very angry and stern looking. It may cause them to snore in a very unattractive way. I’m telling you, if I was an interested Kaitlyn suitor, I’d tell everybody that I slept with Kaitlyn which would send them all home. Then I’d show Kaitlyn a video of Shawn snoring, which would completely turn her off. It would probably just be down to me and Nick at which point, I’d take him to those cliffs in Ireland and give him a little nudge off the edge.

Speaking off cliffs with sharp edges, I feel so sad for Chris “Cupcake” Dentist. He was always a tad too sensitive for my liking, but he’s completely genuine and I felt horrible for him. Especially once that sob sequence began. They really should plan these dates better. A guy feeling that low should have a harness tethered to something so he can’t throw himself off the edge after getting dumped by the woman he saw as his wife. That chemistry was just never there. We all knew it. But poor Cupcake didn’t know.

Thank goodness that JJ is gone. And how awesome that Kaitlyn got to do this after he admitted that he cheated on his wife. RUN, KAITLYN. You know the expression, “Once a cheater…” I mean, yes, he’s learned from his mistakes. I’m sure he’d never cheat on Clint. At least these two can reunite and explore their love.

I feel bad for Joe Kentucky. He’s another very genuine guy who Kaitlyn has no chemistry with. Joe is saying all the right things. He’s quirky and funny and wears his heart on his sleeve. Kaitlyn needs someone more sophisticated and I just don’t see Joe fitting that bill.

I felt really bad for Ben Z, who I found absolutely charming and wonderful. He’ll be a contender for the next Bachelor, for sure. Along with Handsome Ben H, who I adore and is my #1 pick for next Bachelor. I liked Ben H even more for calling out Kaitlyn on the odd behavior that went on when she went off camera roading with him and Shawn. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but he knew something had changed. Smart guy. Intuitive. If he only knew the secrets. I wonder if he’ll stick around once he hears the Nick News. CAN I START MY BEN H FOR BACHELOR CAMPAIGN NOW??!!

As for the Dublin dates – they were beautiful and romantic – but this Dublin week seemed like the longest week of dates EVER. I kept asking The Husband, “Have we left Dublin yet?” I guess we did with the road trip with Jared. I also really like Jared – sincere, up for anything – but again, he’s missing that sophistication / edge that Kaitlyn seems to need. I am really wondering what she sees in the intensity of Shawn – does she really find him handsome? Is his stern nature something that she finds attractive? Maybe Cupcake is correct – maybe Kaitlyn doesn’t know what she needs or wants in a husband. Would she really be this confused, emotionally drained if she had the capability of finding a husband through this process? She does seem a little all over the place. I am rooting for her nonetheless (why not?!) and hope she can get it together.

Other things worth mentioning:

- Nick is like one of 17 kids if I recall correctly from Andi’s season. Ok, maybe more like 9 brothers and sisters, but still a LOT. I hope we get to see his youngest sister again because I remember she was funny and cute and the best part about Nick.

- I really want to meet Ben H’s family. Really just to see what he’s all about so I can pull for him when he’s the next Bachelor

- Kaitlyn is definitely our most daring / sultry Bachelorette when it comes to evening gown wear. Every dress she’s worn has some major sexy element to it (open back, see-through material, etc).

- Tanner who?

- It was such an intense moment when Shawn came to Kaitlyn’s hotel room for the second time to come clean on his feelings (not really sure what we learned the second time around, but ok) and Kaitlyn thought he was going to confront her about the Nick sex thing but really that had nothing to do with it. And it’s not clear whether this made Kaitlyn feel better or worse. But I think everyone can agree that Shawn will need some serious drugs and should NOT be standing near a Cliff or be handling heavy machinery or knives when he finds out that she slept with Nick.

- What would Andi say about Nick getting emotional when he has one on one time with Kaitlyn later on? Are the tears real? They seemed spontaneous to me. Or maybe he’s worried about being the runner up twice in a row. Always a Bachelorette loser, never the Bachelor. Hmmm.

- Ben Z was so big that as he was kissing Kaitlyn, it seemed that his mouth would cover her entire below-nose section of her face. He’s just built like a bear and Kaitlyn is so petite.

- I like Kaitlyn’s hair in a pony tail. She’s never worn it up.

- Kaitlyn’s regret. It’s become another contestant on the show. She regrets her intimate night with Nick. Not because of the sex. But because it disrespects what she had with the other guys. True dat. She also regrets telling Shawn that he was the ONE. So what does a regretful Bachelorette do? Switch up the order of the show! We can’t have a regretful, kissing bandit Bachelorette go meet 4 families. Let’s give her more alone time to feel out these guys (aka – more sex with more guys so they all get equal treatment). Then we’ll trim the fat and only have her meet two people’s families. At this point, Nick has got to be in the final two. If she hasn’t kicked Shawn out yet, he’ll stay until the end (though I still don’t understand her big obsession with him). The chemistry between Kaitlyn and Nick is much easier and natural. Like him or hate him, she LIKES the guy. Or at least she did pre-sex.

Wild card spot goes to Ben H (he’s just so adorable, smart and noble but a bit too vanilla perhaps for Kaitlyn. Also, he’s 26 – which means he may have a bit more living to do before he’s deemed “ready” in Bachelorette speak.

Ok, off to bed. Long day tomorrow. I’ve got to figure out what these guys’ reactions to Kaitlyn will be next week.

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Nick Ploughs The Bachelorette’s Lawn in Dublin, Ireland

nickI can just picture my mother-in-law’s face as she watches The Bachelorette tonight. It’s her birthday, by the way, so she probably has way more exciting things to do than watch the show, but I know she’s a loyal fan (Happy birthday!!). I also know that Kaitlyn’s behavior was bugging her BEFORE tonight. After tonight, I’m not even sure how to defend Kaitlyn

So there’s Nick. You either think there’s something “off” about him or you’re willing to give him another chance post-Andi’s season. Or maybe you’re new to this season and don’t understand why everybody hates him so much. And Kaitlyn is giving him absolutely no challenge whatsoever. She brings him to join her show against the wishes of the guys and at the risk of losing their respect. She gives him plenty of attention on the group dates and then gives him the group rose date so he knows he’s not forgotten. Then to fully secure the sentiment that NICK IS HERE TO STAY, she gives him the only one-0n-one date in Dublin. Her actions speak volumes. As if all of these gestures aren’t enough, she goes off script and invites the guy back to her room. And not just for “more time to get to know each other by talking” – Kaitlyn does it for the REAL DEAL. She’s not fooling around. She’s ready to go. And like Nick is going to stop her. They are 100% lusting on each other. They may like each other on an emotional level, but there’s no room to find that out because they can’t keep their hands off each other.

So do we even bother speaking about Ian and his rude, but direct speech to Kaitlyn where he called her shallow, only being there to make out with dudes and that he was sick of all the farting, sex jokes? Ian seemed so sincere when he spoke about the accident he was in and his recovery. A completely different human being. Once he started throwing out tidbits about him being super deep and a former model and a Princeton graduate, it’s like a flip switched and he became an arrogant, self-righteous person.

So let’s say you suddenly realize that you don’t like The Bachelorette. She’s not for you. What do you do? a) wait it out and bide your time to get the most out of the free travel – ultimately realizing that you’ll get sent home b) let the Bachelorette know that you’re not feeling it and that you’re on two different pages and you’d like to go home c) make a complete scene by calling out The Bachelorette as a brainless whore to her face, tell her you’re deeper, make a ploy at becoming the next Bachelor on your limo ride home, then rant that you “can’t wait to have sex,” after you’ve complained that sex is the only thing the other guys talk about. I think he went with “c.” It seems like every week, one of the guys loses it and crashes and burns. This week it was Ian. Good riddance, but you can see his side of it. Nick slickly talks himself into joining the gang. Kaitlyn falls for him head over heels while she makes out with him and everybody else. What is Ian supposed to think? He could have phrased it in a more respectful manner, but I kind of see where he’s coming from.

Dublin seems like an awesome city. Lots of beer drinking. Beautiful churches. The Cranberries (awesome!), Jig dancing and free sex. Well, maybe not so free according to the scenes from next week. And pigeons. So many pigeons. A good friend of mine has a serious fear of birds, so that part cracked me up as I’ve seen how terrifying birds can be to someone scared of them. The Irish wake really disturbed me. Out of all the amazing, unique things they could have done in Ireland, they had to do a fake death ritual? Is this another event evidencing Kaitlyn’s somewhat off sense of humor? Poor Ben Z was obviously not in a place to take such an odd date idea lightly. Particularly when she’s asking each of them to make a funeral like speech about her. Is this the figurative death of the show? I can’t understand who thought this was a good idea (and remotely entertaining).

I was sitting on the edge of my seat, wondering if Nick was going to say something to the other guys about his passionate night. I wonder if any of them will leave once they find out. He only used the word “intimate” to describe his time in the hotel room. You can see Sean’s blood boil from a few feet away. That guy is on the verge of cracking. How can he hear about the Nick / Kaitlyn hotel fling and not explode? He’s like a ticking time bomb.

Some additional thoughts on the night:

  • Jared is the dark horse here. He looks so young and boyish, it’s hard to picture him as ready to settle down, but he seems very serious about Kaitlyn and she’s into him. But how could she not want that romantic candlelit church / Cranberries concert time with Hot Ben from Denver? I think The Husband and I both have a crush on him at this point. Or Ben Z who needed a serious pick me up? Or even Sean who was having a hissy?
  • Nick should never wear bowties. It just makes him look creepier than his already questionable personae.
  • I think Nick is enjoying his “power position,” and using tricks he’s seen on former Bachelor seasons – like when Emily Maynard was traveling with her guys abroad and they kept pushing her up against walls in foreign cities to make out with her. That’s a power move. Nick used it and was proud of himself. Smirk and all.
  • I was kind of sad to see the Woody from Cheers welder guy go home. He was innocent and goofy, even if he did say all the wrong things to Kaitlyn.
  • Seriously, can she just send Ben H home now so he can start preparing for a more civilized, less horny season of The Bachelor?
  • At least Kaitlyn admits she’s a “make-out bandit.” She’s very open about intimacy and sex being a big part of a relationship, so she’s testing the waters early.
  • Kind of loved all the random moaning and camera footage of the closed bedroom door in Caitlyn’s hotel room. Especially when the scene ended with a shot of a bursting fountain. This show is ridiculous but it cracks me up.
  • What is Kaitlyn’s mother thinking while watching tonight’s episode?
  • peter-stormare-blond-villain-in-Fargo-jew-hollywoodThe angrier Sean gets, the more like Fargo’s Peter Stormare he looks. I’m pretty certain he’s going to tackle or murder someone at this point.

So what do you think? Are you still hopeful there can be a happy ending? If she can tame the Nick lust factor, disclose and somehow get away with revealing to the other guys that she boned Nick and control her hormones slightly, Kaitlyn might actually find a lasting emotional connection with Jared, Sean or the Bens. JJ just needs to leave already. I don’t really think about the rest. Except I like hearing Kentucky speak. The dentist is too effeminate for me. Who’s Tanner?

What do you think?

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The Bachelorette Kaitlyn Bristowe Searches for the Truth in San Antonio

Kaitlyn: two steppin with the future bachelor?

Kaitlyn: two steppin’ with the future bachelor?

Oy. Kaitlyn’s choice of Nick last week has really gotten her into quite a pickle. Once again, I forgot that we’re flipping the rose ceremonies to the beginning of the episodes and struggle to recall the previous week’s drama. Then I saw Nick’s face and watched him walk into the awkward room of men competing for Kaitlyn. That’s got to be what they mean by “Lion’s Den.” It gave me indigestion. Maybe it was like the pasta dish I ordered in which had too much olive oil and made me slightly ill. That’s kind of how I see Nick. He’s tempting to Kaitlyn, but too much of him will ruin everything.

What did we learn about Nick this episode? Let’s see:

- He did recently see Andi Dorfman, former Bachelorette. They hashed out some of their outstanding issues (would love to hear HER take on their meet up and how it went).

- He tries to give Bachelorette process dating advice, but comes off as cocky

- He claims to be past his declared undying love for Andi. Hmmmm

- He thinks Kaitlyn is a “cool chick” and this offends Josh and sets off his right vs. wrong vs. intuition radar to the extreme

- He’s using his veteran Bachelorette status to his advantage by one-upping the other guys on the group date, taking her up to a balcony to serenade her and then stealing some kisses with her after he finished

- He’s making the others in the house question themselves, their relationship with Kaitlyn and their sanity.

Can I just say that Ben H (Two steppin’ Ben) just NEEDS – not maybe – but DEFINITELY – to be the next Bachelor? That’s the only reason I’m slightly hoping that Ryan Gosling’s cousin – Shawn or Nick or even the other Ben edge him out. Ben’s just an unquestionably charming, down to earth guy who is easy on the eyes. Ok, fine, so he’s only 26, and what guy that looks THAT good and is single and could really have any woman in the world choose to settle down? It’s not possible. But Ben H should give it a go anyway, and I’d sure like to watch. Ben H for Bachelor. I like how he took the Two Steppin’ thing by the horns and made the best of it. He’s like twice the height of Kaitlyn, but sure knows how to dip her.

The group date was yet another shaming of the boys, which seems to be a theme this season. Kaitlyn must love watching people make fools of themselves to entertain her. Best part of their date was the young boy who stole Kaitlyn’s heart initially with his singing and wise cracks. Maybe he should enter the pool.

Then the most awkward point of the night comes when Josh gets his hair cut (so Kaitlyn was a barber? Now? In a former life? Did we know this?) and ends up with a misshaped head. Maybe the lack of hair got to his brain, but his spewing of accusations and confessions to Kaitlyn seemed to set him off into a tailspin. He can’t focus on anything but his distrust for Nick. He gets Kaitlyn all riled up by telling her that everyone else is lying to her about how they feel about Nick joining the show. Then when Kaitlyn calls Josh out on it, nobody fesses up, leaving Josh to look like a victim of his own naivety (he really reminded me of the character Woody from Cheers in this episode).

As for the Shawn solo date – you could just feel the chemistry oozing off them. We finally heard our first “I’m falling in love” declaration, followed by a chaser declaration and some hotel room making out by Jared. Nice job, Jared, but you’re about 24 hours too late. San Antonio looks like a lot of fun, but I was more interested in watching Kaitlyn ooze excitement from being with Shawn. He’s got to be the one, no? First impression rose, She finds him hot. He’s already pissed as hell about Nick, but likes Kaitlyn enough to open up and fall in love. This has disaster written all over it.

My questions to ponder as I slowly and unhappily digest my olive oil ridden pasta dish are as follows:

How does everyone find out that Kaitlyn had sex with someone? Is that someone Nick? Can Shawn ever forgive her?

What the heck is up with Ian? I mean, did Nick trigger the narcissistic, egomaniac, delusional sector of his brain? It’s like he just snapped and started launching some of the most hurtful comments ever uttered to a Bachelorette. He basically called her a dumb slut who is uninteresting. Is anyone allowed to not fall in love with the Bachelorette at this point? Couldn’t he have just said, “Sorry, this process isn’t working for me. I think it’s best that I go” and gone about his life with his “way better looking” girlfriends, his impressive resume and gotten back into modeling rather than degrade Kaitlyn?

On the other hand – was he just being all about honesty in light of Kaitlyn’s little speech? There’s honest and then there’s crossing the line. Ian certainly smashed the line with his outspoken, rude opinions. I hope Kaitlyn can react quickly enough to let him have it.

Ok, so who’s left that’s interest? We’ve got the Bens, the Shawn, the Nick and everyone else. I’ve got some ginger ale to sip on.

Here’s hoping your week ahead is full of just the right amount of honesty, romance and two-steppin.

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The Bachelorette Adds Nick Viall to the Mix in NYC

Guess who's back...

Guess who’s back…

Oh, Kaitlyn. What did you do? Don’t you know it’s against every rule in Bachelor history to bring an “outsider” into the mix once the season is well underway? Nobody is going to like it. Well, Nick will like it. But you’ll hate yourself and question your decision over and over and the guys will wonder why they’re not enough for you. Shouldn’t you just KNOW that your husband is there already? And if Nick is capable of making you confused with like a strange glance and some quick kissing within minutes of getting you alone, are you REALLY ready to settle down and be The Bachelorette? Should you be out there dating others without trying to marry them? OH, KAITLYN. This does not make me happy.

From Andi’s season, we are supposed to dislike Nick. He seemed shifty and was not to be trusted after he announced at the live finale that they had “made love” in the fantasy suite and he was confused about why she would then choose someone else. I mean, he has a point, but nobody is actually supposed to vocalize this stuff! So if Kaitlyn knows this about him, why is she willing to take Andi’s sloppy seconds? Also, his little smile creeps me out for some reason. Maybe the adjective I’m looking for here is “smarmy.” Urban Dictionary defines “smarmy” as the following: “A certain attitude often accompanied by a squinty look and a superior smile that makes you instantly hate a person. Similar to snobby.” Do you agree? Maybe it’s his creepy resemblance to Spencer Pratt.

I mean, we can talk about the actual dates this week, but aren’t we all thinking about Nick? And Kaitlyn’s mistake, I mean decision, to keep him around? He’s bad news. I already know it.

One other mistake – why didn’t she kick out JJ with his ridiculous buddy Clint? And did anyone else think that post-JJ turning on Clint, which forced them to have a very intimate face to face confrontation by the entryway of the mansion – that they were going to kiss? Do guys fight like this? Nose to nose and cursing at each other? Could that argument be staged? I just can’t understand the intense bond these two formed, but clearly JJ is far more affected by Clint’s departure and how it all went down than he will ever be by Kaitlyn.

I find the new format of the show somewhat difficult to follow as I can never remember where we left off and need a few minutes to re-acclimate myself to the drama. Then the show cuts off each week at the EXACT moment you think you’re getting closure. Let’s go right into some additional important thoughts about tonight:

  • If Ben H (adorable Denver Ben) is not chosen by Kaitlyn, he needs to be the next Bachelor. He is not only the best looking of the bunch, he just screams “sincere, good dude.” I like him. In fact, I’m already getting excited for his season because this season seems to be going nowhere fast. It’s a hot mess at the moment.
  • Did we miss the intro where we learn about Kaitlyn and her background? Do we know why she’s so into rap? Or theater / singing? Is that part of her life back home? All of her dates have an “entertainment” theme to them. Teach me how to Dougie. Hearing some of these non-rappers put forth the effort was somewhat entertaining.
  • Ashley S (crazy Ashley from Chris Soules season) still has that maniacal look in her eye. She does say the wisest thing she’s ever said in Bachelor history by calling Kaitlyn’s interest in Nick “lust.” Maybe she’s not so crazy after all.
  • I felt really bad for Jared at the Met date. It seems pretty unfair of Kaitlyn to raise the whole Nick factor to take the temperature of the rest of the guys about her decision. She plays it off that she wants to know how Jared is feeling about it, but it’s obvious she’s wondering who will walk away from the process because of this little snafu. Plus Jared’s eyeball is still messed up from the boxing date.
  • The Aladdin date would have been a LOT cooler if the Dentist and Kaitlyn actually sang on stage. Wasn’t that point of making the guys audition for a singing role? I kept waiting for the two of them to have a speaking role, but I guess it wasn’t fair to the people spending good money to watch the show. The Dentist is smiling ear to ear that he’s Aladdin for the day. The surprise trip to the New Year’s Eve ball is pretty cool.
  • Will Britt be the one with the happy ending over Kaitlyn? Certainly seems that way. She’s all lit up!
  • Does anyone else think that if a goat came knocking at Kaitlyn’s hotel door and mentioned that it had interest in Kaitlyn that she would a) make out with the goat and b) allow the goat to join the process?

Curious as to what your thoughts are on Nick coming back, tonight’s dates and who your favorites are. One last thought about Nick. I mean, yes, it’s Kaitlyn’s journey. And if I was one of her current guys, I’d have to ask myself – would I want Kaitlyn to be with me and have the slightest inkling of doubt because she didn’t get to explore a relationship with someone? Obviously not. It just stings that she doesn’t know at this point that her connections are way stronger than with Nick. Her decision to keep Nick is selfish, but isn’t the whole concept of being The Bachelorette and shouldn’t she see a potential crush all the way through? I’m both curious and annoyed at Smarmy Nick.

The Husband believes he’s caught a head cold, so I’m taking care to stay away from him. He did manage to watch the full episode with me. Such a sacrificer, that guy! Now I’m going to stay far away from him in bed and sleep on my overall opinion regarding what Kaitlyn should have done. If she can sleep on it, so can I.

Goodnight, Bach fans. Leaving you with a new photo of Ellie Lila, who will be 15 months on Wednesday:

IMG_8394

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Kaitlyn the Bachelorette Wrestles Her Way Through Birds & the Bees

sumoI never thought that it would come to this, but I think I might be on Team Healer (Tony). I understood what he was saying about not wanting to deal with all of the violence on the last two dates. First boxing (with several guys sporting black eyes) and now sumo wrestling. I’m sure these guys signed their lives away to compete on this show, but it still doesn’t seem right to put them up to such dangerous situations. All it takes is one nut job to knock another out and someone could get seriously injured. Is the show just out of fresh ideas? We saw Kupah completely dig his own grave and show a pretty nasty drunk side. Then Tony gets riled up from his sumo match and decides he’s a conscientious objector to the Bachelorette physical dates (except sky diving – he’s into that). I was saying to The Husband – what happens when so many contestants just aren’t into The Bachelorette (or Bachelor?). Is it Kaitlyn herself or the season that’s just not clicking right?

caitlynLet’s also say that today was all about a different Caitlyn. I was super shocked at the Vanity Fair photos that came out today of Caitlyn Brenner. Equally impressed with her courage and cleavage! Hoping that Caitlyn finds open mindedness and peace from this change. I hope I look half this good at 65.

splitIn other newsworthy items – if you haven’t seen by now, Chris the Farmer and Whitney announced their breakup. Not much has been shared as the couple revealed that they were very much committed via social media over the last several months. But I’m sure once Dancing with the Stars was over, Chris Soules must have decided that the last thing he wanted to do was settle down in Iowa with Whitney. He never seemed particularly over the moon for her in the first place.

But back to the Bachelorette…some things must be addressed

  • The Bromance between JJ and Clint. Was it fake? Was it real? Why are they self-made villains? Did they both decide that they’re not interested in Caitlin because it seemed up through mid-way of this episode that both them were very much into her. Are they on the show just to make fun of the process? It was hard to figure out what was going on. I think that once the producers find out that someone is trying to make of mockery of their show (and Kaitlin), they gather as much ammunition as possible against that person. Which is evident in all the footage we saw where these two were making raw comments about being villains and Clint mentioning he’s no longer attracted to Kaitlin. I think he was joking about being in love with JJ, but we’ll have to watch more to figure out what the heck is going on with these two.
  • Uncomfortable sex education class. Did I miss something or did they not show the “big reveal” of Kaitlin letting the guys know that the whole class was a joke – that these were actor children all in on a big prank? Those kids looked a bit young to be getting such detailed information from the Bachelorette participants. Was this considered a fun date or just “funny” by Kaitlyn’s sense of humor? I think the best part was listening to Joshua’s description of female puberty.
  • The Bens. I love them. Big Ben did step up during one of the most vile dates in Bachelorette history. If Big Ben wasn’t freaked out by Kaitlyn’s aversion to birds, and he is willing to stick his hand down a toilet covered by huge snakes to get a clue for a game, he’s got to be a good person. Is this the equivalent of an adrenaline date? Haunted house on crack freak show with an element of puzzle solving? Big Ben comforted and guided Kaitlyn and we got to see his sensitive side. He’s definitely a good guy and Kaitlyn is smitten. Ben H is equally dreamy. I think he’s the most handsome of the group and liked his little speech about how to make a baby by falling in love with someone you meet out of a limo.
  • Jared’s bruises. Kaitlyn finds them “sexy.” She seems to be very easily attracted to these guys. Jared still reminds me of a French artist version of Ethan Hawke. You could almost feel the pain when she had a nice intense kiss with him and then gives the group date rose to Ben H. Ouch.
  • Kaitlyn’s gah-gah eyes. She’s got it for blonde Shawn. Maybe with the Bens too.
  • Why does a girl with bird tattoos find birds terrifying?
  • Joe’s “package” should have received its own rose tonight. It was the talk of the town. How awkward for these guys to have put on diapers and look like idiots while they wrestled each other to the ground. Again, I’m with The Healer on this one and I’ll know where to find him. Haha.
  • Not sure I like this reverse order of not showing the rose ceremony each week. It’s very annoying not to have closure and be left in suspense. I actually had forgotten half the stuff leading up to the Kupah departure.

My mother-in-law is getting fed up with the show and I can’t say I blame her. We’re hitting news lows in the last two weeks. Injuries. Violent fighting. Wrestling in diapers. Getting locked in a room with birds, snakes, a scorpion and bugs. Sex education pranks that use child actors who are questionably too young for the subject matter. An eager Bachelorette who seems to be falling for everyone. I’m really hoping that things pick up (at least in the romance department). I feel like half the guys have left and there hasn’t been one romantic date yet. Where’s the cheesy private concert date? Isn’t there a tree to climb? Building to jump off of? Helicopter to hang from? Enough with the fighting. Let’s be romanced!

What did you think of this week’s Bachelorette? Are you more interested in Caitlyn Jenner than Kaitlyn the Bachelorette? Do you like the Bens as much as I do? Good night!

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Boxing & Joke Bombing for The Bachelorette’s Kaitlyn

BenzHappy Memorial Day, Bach fans!!! Hope it was great. We spent the weekend visiting family and schlepping a toddler in a car for 8 hours. Good times! Hope your kick off to summer was awesome. Totally thought today was Sunday and forgot about Bach, but thankfully it was a nice surprise to the end of the long weekend.

Kupah was getting creepier by the second. As soon as he started questioning whether he was on the show to fill a minority quota, I knew this was going nowhere productive. Surprisingly, Kaitlyn was even able to take Kupah’s questioning with an open mind. She reassured him by declaring their initial conversation about music as being the moment she felt a connection. Instead of accepting this and building on it, he challenges her again, then falls back on hoping that his compliments about her eyes and beauty will save him. Kaitlyn’s too smart for that. I was surprised she agreed to “think about it.” Good for her on putting her foot down when she overheard his remarks to the rest of the pack. Then of course we got to see his true colors. Was he about to fight one of the producers? Was that just the alcohol making him lash out? Must have been. What a horrible turn of events. But so glad she’s weeding out the alpha crazy males early.

I really thought that she was going to overhear JJ making one of his grandiose speeches. He’s a complete egomaniac and a definite “turd” as Amy Schumer put it, so I was hoping Kaitlyn would pick up on this. It’s all got to come out at some point.

We’re going to need a translator for Tony the Healer. I have no idea what he was talking about for 95% of the show. He was initially into Britt, but now he’s seeing something special with Kaitlyn. Is his eye healing or was it just bad shadows that made it look like he got beat up last week? He looks like he could be 49 years old. His stand up routine was painfully awkward to sit through, but I guess not everyone is a natural born stand up comedian.

Can we discuss the boxing date? I hated every minute of it. I don’t know why they put these horrible, violent, testosterone filled spectacles together and then act surprised when someone gets seriously injured. The French painter goatee guy (Jared) could have really been hurt. If I was The Bachelorette, I would have demanded an end to this. Why would you put a 225 lb person against a 170 lb person? The Husband says this would NEVER happen in real boxing, so why would the producers think it’s acceptable here – with untrained people who think they’re simply signing up for a dating show? Not getting bashed in the brains is an assumed part of participation. I just hated, HATED this group date and hope that the show gets the message that setting up such ridiculous drama for the “entertainment” of the viewers is gross.

I do like Clint. And the underwater photography date was very unique. At least they didn’t make them dress up in a bridal gear. Clint seems very centered, down to earth and normal. I like that he has a solid career – doesn’t an architectural engineer have to be some sort of genius?

I still like the welder, though it sounds like they may have absolutely nothing in common. He’s never been in love before which is always a red flag. I like Kentucky guy. He’s sweet, innocent and charming. I like both Bens. I like Ian, the guy who got hit by a car going 60 mph. He’s like part robot – to survive something like that.

Some things I don’t understand:

  • Why is every guy so shiny on the show? Do they not powder these men? It looks like they had vaseline applied to their noses and cheeks.
  • Justin, the guy who kept checking to see who was knocking on the door, is particularly shiny. I’m also confused as to whether he has a giant zit next to his nose or if it’s a mole. Ok, sorry, that was very superficial, but it’s driving me crazy and in meeting a guy for the first time, I’m wondering if Kaitlyn is paying attention to it.
  • Is the dentist straight? I mean, I know he’s claiming to be, but that green shirt threw me off again.
  • Are celebrity guests the new “thing” since Jimmy Kimmel was such a hit? I kind of like this a LOT.
  • Chris Harrison’s purple shirt with two zip pockets on each side. I just have no idea what statement he was trying to make.

Kaitlyn’s a beautiful girl, but it seems like she’s in love with everyone. I guess that’s what they’re supposed to do, but all the kissing is so bold, so early on in the season!

I’m happy for Britt and boyfriend Brady. I’m wondering if Kupah will come looking for her too.

What do you guys think?

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